Us and Them: The importance of making understanding (not agreement) the goal in polarized conversation
February 19, 2020
I was recently invited to contribute to a community panel discussion on the phenomenon of polarized discourse in our society and communities. The following are some of the thoughts I shared at that event. As a professional mediator, I’m part of bringing polarized people together…
The Black in my Throat
January 20, 2020
I remember it so clearly. It was a cold, crisp winter day when I picked up my son (then 7) after school. I could tell he was upset by something. On our walk home, he didn’t say much but he did share that “something happened with Evan”, one of his friends. And I could tell that he…
The greatest problem in communication is the illusion that it has been accomplished. – George Bernard Shaw
January 10, 2020
Much of what happens in human interactions exists inside our own heads and hearts – it’s private, unheard and unseen by my communication partner. The only thing that the other person knows is my action: my words, tone, body language… What they can not see are my personal,…
High-Performance Expectations: Five Practical Ways to Maximize your Training Investments
December 9, 2019
I recently read a thought-provoking and very practical book entitled The Heart of Coaching: Using Transformational Coaching to Create a High-Performance Coaching Culture by Thomas G. Crane (2012). It was especially interesting for me to read it with both of my…
Managing “High Conflict” Behaviours
November 28, 2019
If any of you are like me, at some point in your life you will have come across a very difficult person (likely, more than one!). You know, the kind that doesn’t seem to respond to typical/traditional/common sense approaches to conflict resolution and problem solving. No matter w…
Why Some People Don’t Respond to Feedback and What You Can Do About It
November 5, 2019
In my work as a mediator and conflict management specialist, I commonly hear laments from leaders about employees that are not responding to their feedback. The course-correction just isn’t happening and it is very frustrating. What’s going on? Well, at Facilitated Solutions, we…
Why Collaboration Might Not Always Be the Preferred Approach (*GASP*)
October 30, 2019
The best advice I think I’ve ever heard for facing the confusion of conflict: Pause. And Choose. Last weekend, I found myself in conflict with my brother. He had an idea for how he thought we should spend our time together as an extended family during the holidays this December.*…
What is ADR?
September 20, 2019
For decades now, the acronym “ADR” has typically been used as a stand in for the mouthful: Alternative Dispute Resolution. At the ADR Institute of Manitoba, and here at Facilitated Solutions, we prefer to see ADR as APPROPRIATE Dispute Resolution. Here’s why: Mediation, arbitrati…
Why Should I Consider Workplace Mediation?
September 16, 2019
Why should I even consider mediation? What’s in it for me?? These are very common (and appropriate) questions. This is my typical 2 minute response:
Perceptions Matter in the Workplace
September 11, 2019
Determining the facts is an important aspect of assessing whether or not someone has breached policy. But please don’t forget that, regardless of the facts or the “capital T” Truth, how people perceive one another, their behaviour and the situation in general matters just as much…