Understanding your disagreement, i.e. what the disagreement is really about, is just the first step to resolution. Diagnosing your disagreement is about uncovering what is really important to you regarding the issue in contention. Once you can articulate your underlying needs, fears, wants, concerns, hopes, etc. you will likely be much more successful in coming… Read more →
Relationships
Diagnosing a disagreement
What is surface disagreement, jagged peaks of icebergs facing off with each other, beneath may be joined when we have eyes to see. –Tilden Edwards One of the keys to conflict resolution, especially in complex disagreements, is the identification of the interests of each party. Shifting from positions to interests is crucial for… Read more →
The season for courageous conversations
In the run up to the holidays, stresses seem to sometimes get the better of us. Conflicts at work tend to build as the winter months set in. Tensions at home can become increasingly strained with the pressure and stresses of the season. Extended family gatherings with their complex dynamics are just around the corner…. Read more →
What is empathy?
What is empathy and why is it different that sympathy? Brene Brown on why connection is the only thing that can help hurting people feel better:
This is water
I recently came across the late David Foster Wallace’s 2005 commencement address to the graduating class of Kenyon College. His compelling advice to those young adults about the “daily grind” issues a challenge to each of us, every day. He says: “Learning how to think” really means learning how to exercise some control over how… Read more →
The conflict cycle
Real freedom is the ability to pause between a stimulus and a response and, in that pause, choose. – Rolo May Conflict is a natural and inevitable part of life. It is primarily our actions and reactions to these challenges that determine whether the situation will have constructive or destructive results. … Read more →